Why Are We Delaying The Change?

Why are we postponing the change until later?

Why do we always do a retrospective of our life at the end of the year? We don’t really do this out of nostalgia,  but rather in order to determine if the life we ​​lead is right for us. 

Some people are happy with it while others feel a bewildering emptiness despite what they have accomplished important.

Do we want to relive the same experiences as this year?

We invite people who do not feel in harmony with their life whether it is because of health, financial, family or love problems to ask themselves the following question:

How did you get to where you are? Do you have a clear idea of ​​where you want to go or what you want for yourself? 

The objective is to draw a life project. It allows us to see if we are following the path that will lead us to the goals we set for ourselves at the start of the year by taking certain steps or by changing.

For this it is necessary to know who we are,  to know what personal talents we have, such as independence, creativity or patience. We all have a potential that has allowed us to succeed,  what is yours?

After looking back, some people decide to give up a lifestyle that no longer works for them.

They arm themselves to face a divorce, the loss of their job, an illness or the disappearance of a loved one. All of these situations are a source of anxiety because they take people out of their comfort zone.

It’s easy to get used to people, different situations or places, especially if we don’t make changes in our life.

For other people, the New Year reminds them that they have tolerated an abusive relationship for a long time. They will say: “I never wanted that” “I have no choice”. 

It is important that people who find themselves in this type of relationship know that in order to change something they do not like, it is essential that they know who they are, what their abilities are and what they can rely on. In summary: what are these qualities that give you value?

To put our lives in order, it is imperative to begin by realizing our value as a person, because one of the factors that prevent us from moving forward is:

The fear

At the start of the year, we go back to our routine, forgetting all our new goals. Some go to the gym every day to lose the weight gained over the Christmas holidays, others make an appointment with their doctor after Christmas scares.

But the majority quickly forgets the good resolutions taken on January 1, or others see no way out of their situation:  unemployment, divorce, mistreatment, terminal illnesses.

We have all faced difficulties at one time or another. In these cases, we seek help from our friends, our religious leader, our lawyer or even our psychologist.

Some people prefer to blame others rather than admit that the problem is on their own, because this would mean that they are partly responsible for their fate and therefore, that they may no longer be in a position. victim.

However, fear paralyzes them and prevents them from making the necessary changes.

But what is fear?

Fear is an unpleasant emotion triggered by a feeling of danger. This sensation arises from a series of thoughts that are based on real or fictitious situations.

For example, the origin of the fear of a person who believes that he is going to get sick going out on the street because he is exposed to bacteria, is different from that of a person whose husband constantly beats him and the threat of death.

The first type of fear is based on an idea that is the fruit of the imagination, while the second is based on concrete facts.

However,  the majority of people express different types of fear:

• Fear of abandonment
• Fear of rejection
• Fear of failure
• Fear of being alone
• Fear of being different

These fears have their origin in invented ideas that are linked to change. This is why some people do everything to please others, even if their actions are a source of discomfort for them.

They are afraid of the unknown,  a feeling that is based on insecurity. However, it is necessary to distinguish the effects of fear in humans.

Fear has a positive aspect  when it acts as a warning mechanism in the face of imminent danger of physical injury, which allows us to flee or act according to the danger that threatens our survival.

The negative aspect of fear lies mainly in the fact that it generates anxiety and that it paralyzes us. 

The most effective way to deal with fear is to recognize that it exists. For this it is necessary to observe how we behave in the face of various events and to try to think about when fear and anxiety arise.

Since fear is based on personal insecurity, you must gather  all the information you will need before carrying out an important project, having an interview or facing situations in which you will have to make decisions. 

Getting informed is a key step before making a decision. Be realistic about how things will unfold, allow yourself a margin of error, because no one is perfect.

Even if you think of every possible scenario imaginable, situations will always arise where you don’t have all the information in hand to make a wise decision.

When faced with fear, it is normal that certain concerns and questions arise. This is why we must weigh the pros and cons of the choices we face in any given event.

Thus, the bravest is not the one who claims that he is never afraid, but the one who recognizes his existence and who learns to control it.

Photography courtesy of deollyy

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