Strong sensitivity is a character trait, a gift that sometimes weighs heavily, which overflows and gives you the impression of being a lonely island surrounded by an ocean filled with pins …
Hypersensitivity was first described in 1975 by American psychologist Elaine Aron. Her idea was to deepen the characteristics of introversion, and she discovered something very interesting very quickly.
The introverted personality does not have the same classic and common pattern in all people. So, as of today, and thanks to the research of Jonathan Cheek, we know that there are 4 very different types of introverted personalities.
For her part, Elaine Aron, in her book “ The highly sensitive person ”, explains that one in five people is hypersensitive. It is therefore not a character trait belonging to introversion itself. In other words: it’s a different kind of personality.
To feel joy or sadness of great intensity, to feel the suffering of others, to be very intuitive already since childhood, to enjoy solitude, to be very sensitive to pain, to light or to intense sounds …
All of these often define hypersensitive people, who are usually not aware that they are until adulthood. Until life shows them that they always seem to go “against the grain”.
However, among all these dimensions, there is an emotion that hypersensitive people experience in a more complex way. And yes, we are talking about love …
How do you maintain a relationship with a person who doesn’t feel things as intensely as we do? How to manage this amalgam of emotions without losing your balance?
How to overcome disillusion or failure? Here are 5 tips that can help you.
Love, self-respect, is a pact that must last a lifetime. If there is anything for sure, it is that the hypersensitive person has spent a lot of time “feeling different”, “like a funny bird”.
Why do you take things to heart? But, why are you so sensitive if nothing happened?
Surely you must have heard such well-known phrases before. In the end, if after a while you realize that you often hear the same reproaches from your other half or those around you, it is very likely that your self-esteem is weakened.
You may be sick of suffering, seeing people moving in one direction as you move against the tide. Do not let suffering hurt you anymore, free yourself from your negative emotions, accept yourself and put forward your positive capacities.
The life of a hypersensitive person can be wonderful, intense and subtle because it is lived with the heart.
2. Accept that others do not feel things as intensely as you do.
Chances are, you’ve felt frustrated because your other half didn’t realize the same things you did. She was not so perceptive, so sensitive to details, to looks …
You know how to read through gestures, you pay attention to every aspect, you take care of every word and every movement …
However, your other half seems to be blind to these multiple details. Does that mean she loves you less? Not at all.
Love never feels the same way, but that doesn’t mean the other doesn’t love us. Our other half loves us, but in their own way, and you, in your way too.
3. Deal with negative emotions, don’t become a prisoner of them
When a hypersensitive person suffers from disillusionment, when faced with a breakup, betrayal or lie, their suffering can lead to defenselessness and depression.
If happiness and love are experienced in a truly intense way, failure is experienced just as strongly. And the inner fall can be very serious.
Do not accept this, accept adversity early on, the existence of failure, the knowledge of sadness … Realize that life has black holes that you must never sink into.
Make your emotions the strength of your daily life, be resilient. Learn from your losses.
4. The wisdom of loneliness
If there is one aspect in which you have an advantage, it is in the wisdom of loneliness. You are one of those people who appreciate being alone, to create, read or listen to music …
You have a very vast inner knowledge, you know how to listen to yourself and take care of yourself. You know how to tame the knowledge of loneliness, because you are comfortable there. Loneliness allows you to be yourself, in all your greatness.
Choose the person you want to build a life with, but don’t create an obsessive attachment or dependency on another person. Don’t hold on with all your might. Do not lose the pleasure of your moments of solitude.
5. Having a romantic relationship with you will always be worth it.
Love is an adventure that is always worth living. And if you are in a romantic relationship with someone who is hypersensitive, the adventure can be as incredible as it is beautiful.
Because you are able to offer this sincerity which comes from the heart, which knows how to foresee and make people happy, which knows how to bring maximum happiness and which does not know the lie …
Do not close the doors of your heart because you have experienced disappointment or failure. A life that is lived with the heart has much to offer the world.
Image courtesy of Catrin Welz Stein.