We are more and more surprised at the behaviors that children can have towards their parents: lack of respect, insults, raising of the voice, among others. An authority which should come from the parents, but which comes from the children.
It seems that the roles have been reversed. It is no longer the parents who set the standards and impose the punishments, but the children who have all the authority.
What happened ? Why this change? Since the establishment of spanking or pulling the ears as abuse, parents have feared and children have seen here an effective way to manipulate their parents.
This submission is not at all beneficial for our children, who grow up being hostile to their own families and with an authoritarian behavior which, sooner or later, will come back to them in full face.
In the mind of the authoritarian child
A child with Little Emperor Syndrome will always choose what he wants to eat, what others should do, when to go out, where to go with the family on vacation, what to watch on television… Ultimately, he orders, dictates and commands others as well as himself.
These children have an underdeveloped empathy. This means that they are not able to experience the emotions and feelings that allow them to put themselves in other people’s shoes.
If we do not carry out what the authoritarian child orders and dictates, we will have to put up with his small crises, his circus and sometimes even his attacks.
He then becomes a child more than authoritarian, like a dictator. It is very easy to distinguish a child who has Little Emperor Syndrome because he has the following characteristics:
- He has the personality traits of egocentricity.
- He has a very low tolerance for frustration.
- He does not know how to control or regulate his feelings and emotions.
- He does not tolerate that his demands are not met.
- He does not know the weaknesses of others.
- He is an expert who psychologically manipulates others.
When we recognize all of this, we may wonder why we are not doing anything to solve these problems, especially when we see it from the outside.
There are many TV shows that show this terrible behavior. Why do parents not act accordingly? Why are they afraid but especially why did they allow their own children to dominate them?
The importance of education
For reasons that we do not know, there are parents who have a passive and fairly relaxed education that makes these children become authoritarians sooner or later.
This not only causes problems at home, but also at school. How are the teachers going to be able to cope with these authoritarian personalities?
These children do not know what respect, forgiveness is… they do not know at all where their place is.
This is why they become provocative people, with no other goal in life than to have everyone at their mercy. Parents have chosen to passively educate their children, without measuring the consequences.
We know that educating is an adult job, which requires a lot of effort and energy. We have the responsibility to educate them, which irreparably requires effort.
When they are still children, we can believe that we have time to resolve this attitude which is beyond us at times.
The problem is when adolescence arrives and we find ourselves enveloped in a whirlwind of contradictory actions that can lead to aggression.
This step towards maturity is drowned in something that they consider to be “correct”. They are just wasting their time and their life, believing that they are enjoying it.
This is why it is important, as parents, to strive to educate our children well, so that they learn the value of the effort and that they know that it is important to be responsible and respectful of others.
Limits are necessary. We train people who will live in this world, and of whom we should be proud. If we don’t care, we won’t get any change.
Bossy children will often fall before they can learn successfully, but they will never understand why no one has helped them to be well educated.