Ending a relationship shouldn’t be seen as a failure.
The failure of our emotional autonomy would be present if we persisted in continuing in an unhealthy, unproductive relationship with no prospect of evolution.
That is, a relationship where it is impossible for us to love with purity and intensity.
As the fantastic Frida Kalho has stated, it is best not to linger where the other cannot love.
What we do not let go we carry on our shoulders. What we wear weighs us down, and what weighs us down.
Based on this premise, it is essential to understand that fear and doubt are normal and that they often accompany us throughout our life.
But, let it be clear: love at any cost is a way to kill yourself emotionally.
Knowing how to close stages, a stage of emotional maturity
It is difficult to make things happen when we have to close stages.
Often, relationships are victims of their own weight, which causes discomfort and feelings of being locked up.
One of the first symptoms of emotional claustrophobia is to suffocate in the relationship, to feel that you need to steal, that you have lost your autonomy and that it doesn’t make sense to continue.
Depending on how we plan to resolve the situation (i.e. our greater or lesser motivation to do so), emotional conflict can be resolved in different ways.
It’s very easy to get caught up in this nonsense and turn around and find no way out.
To alleviate this anxiety, there are no magic formulas, as it depends on the confluence of attitudes, experiences, feelings and expectations that prompt us to take the first step.
Everyone must examine themselves and truly determine what they are doing and not doing in order to be able to change the situation, as well as to contemplate what they would really like to do.
During these decisive moments, the fear of heights threatens us very deeply and conditions our pain.
This fear of leaving is normal, which is why it is essential to look for what we want and to put ourselves in the right mood to do it.
You also have to take into account the motivations of the other person.
If we decide to stand on our own two feet, we must know that it will surely not be this idea that will calm us down in the first place.
In fact, saying goodbye takes great courage because of the uncertainty and pain of stepping out of the castle we had formed.
It’s about dealing with inevitable pain. We’re talking about a couple, friendship, or any kind of relationship.
Sometimes it is necessary to put an end to disillusion and disenchantment because they have no solution.
Regularly, snakes change their skin. To shed their old skin, a snake chooses to pass between two nearby stones that hug its body, grate it and help it remove this layer it no longer wants.
As is natural, this transition is not pleasant. In fact, it causes pain, but this action helps it to let go of everything that is worn out to give rise to newness.
When we change our skin and say goodbye, the new beginning can make us very angry.
Let us not forget that we are expanding spaces to allow us to be reborn. Suffering is inevitable when we have to close certain doors, but doing so means respecting and loving each other.
It’s about seeing our life in a different way, being courageous and changing the locks.
Because ultimately, what matters is knowing how to evolve, to allow ourselves stability and to adjust the temperature of our life to our needs.
It is good to reform every now and then, take out the heaviest stones in our backpack and try to relieve the back pain.
We have to get out of this inertia which makes us think that we should continue to adopt the same patterns, the same habits.
Once you’ve done that, don’t focus on what you have lost but on what you have to gain.
Remember: don’t just be “almost happy”. Get out of the movie theater if the movie is bad. Go out of the restaurant if you don’t like the menu or the prices.
Look up and contemplate the other paths if this one is not the right one. Time does not return, do not give a price to your well-being.